Orc Ladies
by Akai'zhar
Summary: What do you think would happen if two girlses switch bodies with a couple of Orcses… Beside be really grossed out of course, look at the story and you’ll see… Sorta. (rated for later chapters where there WILL be swearing) Ch.2 up.
1. Default Chapter

_**I don't own LOTR; I do how ever own Jessica and Katie.**_

Tonight all they had done was listen to Bjork music and play with candle wax, and both girls where falling asleep on the floor, Jessica being a month older than her friend Katie was unfortunately the one who was the least mature and got them playing with the hot candle wax. Katie held up the starfish they pulled from the candle that she dubbed "Legless" because in the removing process, she pulled off his legs.

"Ah... Katie?"

Jessica mumbled into her arm, which she was using as a headrest, she poked Katie's side and Katie rolled over and looked at her.

"Don't poke my tummy fat and what?"

Neither girl was all that pretty, both where a tad of the roly-poly side, one a little more so than the other, Jessica smiled and yawned, the digital clock behind them read '3:30' and the Bjork music was still flowing from the speakers into their ears.

"You know what would suck?"

"What Jess?"

"If we switch bodies with some Orcs."

"Yeah that would suck... Now shut up and go to sleep"

Jessica closed her green eyes and was out like a light, much like Katie was but she was out faster than a lightning strike. Jessica, being the light sleeper that she is, woke up first to the odd shouts and funny smells, she know Katie's little brother smelled really bad, but this smelled like a thousand smelly _MEN_. She sat up and looked around, they where in a forest and big giant things where walking around... Jessica looked down at her hands and they were so much bigger than her hands, she put a hand to her head and she had greasy hair. The "teenager" held back a scream and looked down at Katie, he began to shake her friend and Katie rolled over a slept more, Jessica growled and kicked Katie, she jumped up and pushed her in blind rage.

"What the hell was that-AH, what the bloody hell are you?!"

_**yes I know short "Chapter" but I wanna know, keep it? Re-write it? Or scrap it? (the rest will be funnier promise.)**_


	2. uhoh

Katie looked at the massive creature standing over her. She yelled out for help only to be silenced by the beast.

"Shh! It's me, Jess."

The monster said, although she sounded nothing like what Jessica normally sounded like. Now she sounded like, what Katie could compare to, a gay man who possessed a deep-voice.

Jessica held out her arm to Katie and she hesitantly took it, only to glance down and see that she too was a man, or beast, or whatever they were.  
  
"Hey..."

Katie said, looking at Jessica less than closely as the stink was eye-watering.

"You're an Orc. Like out of Lord of the Rings..."

She trailed off to let Jessica think of something to say.

"Wait." Jess said,  
"If I understand this situation, which I don't, then we must've switched bodies with two orcs. And if we're here, then where are the orcs?"  
  
Katie looked at Jessica with a worried look on her face, then Katie looked down and grinned.  
  
"What could you possibly find funny?" Jess asked her friend, as Katie's eye's trailed back to Jessica's face.

Katie leaned towards Jessica and whispered in her ear,

"Your balls are showing." She pulled her head back to see that below the helm Jessica's orc wore, it's cheeks showed a little less greenish to go somewhat pink.

The two girls woke up to a candle still burning in front of them. Well, at least they looked like girls. The two orcs sprung up in surprise as they looked at each other, the orc in Katie's body punching the orc in Jessica's body in the stomach. They fought for sometime before they both realized that they were both speaking the crude tongue of the orcs. The one in Jessica's body, badly bruised looked in the mirror of Katie's dresser, for before they fell asleep; the two girls had been enjoying a sleepover at Katie's house.

"What are I?"

The orc asked itself and was shocked out of it's puny pee-sized brain to see that the image was copying it's every move.

"What are this?"

The orc in Katie's body asked its companion as he bent down to prod the CD player that was stationed directly across from Katie's door. Unbeknown to him he hit the "Next Disc" button and after a few seconds of silence where the two orcs looked at each other, suddenly the words that reached their ears were that of the no-longer popular Backstreet Boys.  
  
They both clamped their now-human sized hands over their ears as the lyrics of Quit Playin' Games (With My Heart) filled the room. They yelled for one another to destroy the horrible thing when Katie's brother Philip opened the door. As he entered, a terrible stench followed and the sensitive human noses the orc's now possessed could barely stand it.

Philip looked at the two girls in their pajama's holding their hands over their ears.  
  
The orc in Katie's body couldn't stand the stink and decided after a moment of hard thought that he would get this human's help and then destroy him.

He pointed at the CD Player, now trying to cover it's ears and nose at the same time.  
  
Phil narrowed an eye and walked into the room, and then after a second of looking found the button to turn it off.

The orc in Jessica's body finally able to use at least one of it's hands(the other holding his nose from the stench) picked up Katie's clock and smacked Philip over the head; knocking him unconscious. The orcs looked around for something to destroy the human with and finding no sort of weapon snatched at the still-lit candle. Though with a burning candle comes wax, and with two orcs fighting over a wax-filled candle, someone is bound to get hurt. That's what happened.  
  
Both the orc in Katie and Jessica's bodies got wax all over their fingers, and they both simultaneously started sucking on their wax fingers, jumping up and down and howling in pain through gaps in their mouths where their fingers weren't.

Both Katie and Jessica looked around and then at each other (Katie no longer giggling about Jessica having balls, that had been out in the open none-the-less), and decided at the same time that they were in trouble. Of course, if you were a couple of teenage girls in orc bodies, you'd be in trouble to.


End file.
